Tuesday, June 15, 2010

To home or not to home.

I'm home. Well, I've been here for more than half a month now. Anyway, the point is, I'm home. Am I happy? Very. But its the discrepancies between my parents and me that's a turnoff. When I'm home, my Achilles' heel is not only the heel, but the face, limbs, crotch, everything, etc. I say this!, and my dad jumps and says no!that!. Sigh.

Two years ago, we got a broadband connection. Every family has their happy moment as someone from the telephone exchange comes and fixes the router and all. Its quite similar to when a family gets a new car. I was all glad when we got the connection. Since I had developed a habit at the hostel, that of downloading about 1.5 million gigabytes of shit everyday, I didn't bother to ask what the limit was.

One day, I was downloading a movie and my dad walked in.

Dad : Wassup?
Me : Yo. (I don't say that when its my dad I'm talking to. Though, I've started sending him \m/s and all in reply to his occasional How was your exam, son?s and such.)
Dad : What're you doing?
Me : Downloading a movie.
Dad (cold stare) : :|
Me : What!
Dad : Nothing. Just make sure you don't exceed the limit.
Me : How much is the limit?
Dad : 1.5 GB.
Me : Ah. No problem, dad. Won't exceed. Relax. :)

1.5 GB a day. Its less. But , I'll manage, I thought. So I started downloading lesser number of movies everyday. It was tough to manage. But I was doing good. I was keeping the download range between 1-1.5 GB per day. And that was good.

Then. One day, while I was having dinner with parents, this happened :

Dad : You're always on the net, son.
Me : Don't worry, dad. I'm keeping the usage in check.
Dad : I'm sure you are. I know you can manage with 1.5 GB per month. But what I meant was that you don't spend enough time with us.
Me (:O :O :O :O :O :O :O :O :O :O) : :O
Dad : Hmm? Don't you think you should be spending some time with your family? Help mom, help me and all?
Me : :O :O :O :O :O
Dad : What happened?
Me (meekly) : Nothing. Excuse me. I have to go to the bathroom.

I went to the bathroom and I remember having stared at my reflection in the mirror for a whole five minutes. Didn't help though. I had suddenly gone pale. As pale as a fucking white paper. What do I do now! WHAT! I went outside and continued with my dinner. I tried my best to look normal. Later that night we had an argument as to how I don't spend enough time with my family and how I'm always glued to the comp. I let myself lose the argument. That was not even on my worry list. What I was worried about was how I was going to face dad when he got that goddamn bill in his hands. Luck didn't even give me enough time to think over it. In a week or so, the bill arrived. I guessed it by the look dad had on his face when he returned from office. He was like Grr! and I'm uber-angry! and all.

Dad : Son. Come. Lets talk.
Me : Ok.
Dad : The bill just came.
Me : Hmm.
Dad : 7000. Extra.
Me : ...
Dad : How do u explain all this?
Me : ...

And it went on. It went on for longer than LotR. He was like Lets go ask them for the history. I don't know whether that's possible or not, but I sure didn't want him to do that. Lets just say there were some sites I didn't want him to know I had visited. So, there. I was in a fix. If I would have been a 4 year old with American lower class parents, my ass would've evaporated from all the spanking.

Such shit keeps happening when I'm home.

Ooh! Another incident! When I was preparing for all the design entrances half a year ago, I had asked my dad for a D-SLR. He was like You work hard and get admission in one of those design colleges and I'll buy you the best fucking D-SLR out there. And I was like Yay!. So I worked. I worked my ass off, just for the D-SLR. And I got into one of them colleges. So, a couple of days back, I was with dad and he asks me :

Dad : So, will you be taking your digital camera to Pune?
Me (looking at mom) : Erm.
Dad : What?
Me : What about the D-SLR?
Dad : What D-SLR?
Me : Umm, the one you promised?
Dad : I had promised for one only if you got into NID.
Me : WTF! (looking at mom for help) Mom! You promised!
Mom (looking at dad) : Yes. We promised.
Dad : Ok. How much does a D-SLR cost? 5-6k, right?
Me : Erm, no. About ten times that much.
Dad : _|_ then.
Me : :| :|

After some time :

Dad : Ok. U go there and study well. Show me in the first semester that you are serious about studies and then I'll buy you the D-SLR.
Me : Why not right now!
Dad : You'll get distracted.
Me : Dad! Its design I'll be studying. Music, arts, this, that, photography, travel, all of them go together.
Dad : No. Your top priority should be studies.
Me : :|


Home for me is a battlefront. I'm on one side. And dad's on the other. Mom is the negotiator. Home's good. But there're times when I'm forced to ponder over whether this generation gap will ever get bridged or not. Is it always like this? Is this the case everywhere? I mean, I have the best parents ever. I have awesome parents. Awesome-max. Ah. But its this thing between you and your parents, when you say you need a bike and they say they did with a cycle in their times, that's irritating. If one has a talent, why not encourage it? Does everything, EVERYTHING, have to spiral down to studies? Is academia the only thing that's important? Whatever happened to extra curricular talent? There's so much of talent in our country that we can seriously be an awesome folk. We can have our own TV reality show of India's got talent!. But its this thing about academics nation-wide that's stopping us from qualifying for the world cup or having good metal bands and all that jazz. Fine. Us people and the old folks, we give giga-stress on academics. So we crap out highly intelligent people. But what's the good in that if they don't stay here and do something? That leaves us with a lack of people good at M.A.D. and a lack of people with smarts as well. I really hope something happens. Some good shit.

EDIT 1 : How the hell did I manage to drift off to patriotism from home issues? :O



Such! said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Such! said...

Sorry there was a typo in the earlier comment. :|


And echo.
Be happy you got to stay away for 4 years. Think about me and become thankful.

Oh btw, Id dearly like to know the sites you dont want your dad to know about.
Do tell. Do.

William Deng-Deng K. said...

And 2 more years! 2.5 to be precise and more yay! :D Away from home! :D :D :D

Umm. As for those sites, one can easily guess. :)

agnes said...

Giga Awesome post man. I get this shit all day. particularly when the words car and money are mentioned.

Neanderthals. All of them.
Oh, and wrt to the downloading, beloved DC++ I miss you.Now I have to cry myself to sleep every night.

S said...

I have unlimited downloads :D Speed is ok, not bad, and I can download all the crap I want.

I can't emphathize with the parental thing coz my parents generally don't care what I do as long as I'm home by 10:30. It's awesome. But I have my share of complaints too :D

And wow, ok, NID then?! AWESOME you! CONGRATULATIONS!!!

S said...

I have unlimited downloads :D Speed is ok, not bad, and I can download all the crap I want.

I can't emphathize with the parental thing coz my parents generally don't care what I do as long as I'm home by 10:30. It's awesome. But I have my share of complaints too :D

And wow, ok, NID then?! AWESOME you! CONGRATULATIONS!!!

William Deng-Deng K. said...

@ S : No no! Not NID! I got as far as the waiting list though. But didn't clear that. :D (U'll see why I'm happy). I got into MIT-ID. Pune! Yay!

And I have bad speeds and a dl-limit. :| Just yesterday, dad got the internet bill for this month and was angry, yet again.

In that way, I'm happy I didn't get into NID. My parents would have forced me to stay home, and not in the hostels, for 2 years.

@ Weasel : I know! DC++ was like the best thing that's happened in my life and now its gone. :( I keep dreaming about it. :( sob sob.

Tyrant said...

I empathize dude.I have been through all of this and a lot more.I could even start a whole new blog on this issue and manage to update it everyday.But dude,you'll be there only for a month now.Chill :)

P.S : 1.5 GB per month??Is this some prehistoric internet connection??And dude,the sites you visit.Naaiicee :) :P

SSD said...

Design huh! Nice one man. Someone at least tried something different. Very funnily written though. Why not try for a second hand D-SLR?

Raahul said...

Bro - I still remember your classic BSNL Bill story, though I never knew you misunderstood all the 1.5 GB download limit....

Hope Mama / Mami dont read your blog though....

William Deng-Deng K. said...

@ Tyrant : U can call it prehistoric, yus. I can't watch videos, I can't download. I am e-crippled dude. :|

@ SSD : Thanks, man. All that engg. shit, just wasn't for me. :| And yeah, second hand D-SLRs, I can look around for decent ones. Danke for the suggestion. :) I'm kinda desperate for one now. :( Waddup with u nowadays?

@ Bro : Yeah, man. The classic story. :| It left my ass red, man. :|

SSD said...

I'm wiling away time as a writer in JAM. Don't know if you know it, though.

William Deng-Deng K. said...

Yeah. I had heard. Coolness! So no job vob? Tell me no. Jobs and all, man, they suck. :| The traditional ones, that is. 'Writing in JAM' and such, they don't. :)

SSD said...

I couldn't picture myself going in a bus everyday to L & T Powai. Nor could I see myself making PowerPoint presentations and bluffing my way through meetings. Let's see though. I'm hoping to move on to greener pastures :)

William Deng-Deng K. said...

Ah. A kindred spirit, thou art. All that ditto. Like DITTO. Making presentations, wearing formals, reaching on time, meetings, etc. :|

gypsyontherocks said...

faack..thats so dumb of you !! lmao

1.5 gb per day..hahahha

William Deng-Deng K. said...

@ Prayag : Don't rub it in. :|

\1.5 gb per day/

bhavini said...

Freaky post. My hair stood at their excited ends because this is exactly what happens at home here, too. And I keep wondering whether I'm alone. Deep sympathies from a dim little room in Bombay to you. The dialogues (hidden paternal monologues?) were so honestly funny - "Son. Let's talk." - I know!

I once made a list in school for all the guys in my class, with a crossed out 'engineer' next to their names, and 'market journalist' or 'singer' written instead. They're all doing engineering now, and it makes me sad because they're genuinely unhappy. Still, there's time, we're all young. :)

I'm glad you've found what you want to do. That itself is an accomplishment. :)

Congratulations on flying free from the nest!

bhavini said...

PS: DC++. Respect. IITB's LAN. Hurrah! :P

William Deng-Deng K. said...

@ Bhavini : I know! Are all dad's the same? And thanks for that. This shit's fun. No formulae. No calculators. No steam tables. No data books. And best of all, no exams! :D I'm the exact opposite of unhappy, now. :) But there's no LAN here. :( Can't download. Damn. I miss DC++! :(

PS : U're in IIT-B? :O